Nowadays, it has become a fashion for self-proclaimed reformers and watchdog groups to issue diktats on anything under the Sun. The general public instead of protesting against the diktats chose to remain silent and follow the diktats while reservations are kept to oneself. Someone has been issuing diktats on the conduct of marriages.
Some of the diktats range from avoiding celebratory stunts like fireworks and extravaganza, exchange of rings between the bride and bride-groom and cake-cutting ceremonies on the day of Heijingpot etc. For one, they seem to miss the changing menu in Heijingpot and opening of tea and snacks stalls on the day of the marriage ceremony. Not so long ago, the snacks meant for friends of the bride on Heijingpot were quite simple and mostly restricted to the traditional Singju-Bora and Kelichana with few add-ons by the bride’s family. Of course, it is for the bridegroom’s family to send these snacks with expenses for anything the bride and family would like to add. Nowadays, the menu has been completely changed.
The overall expenditure in organising these rituals and ceremonies had increased manifold particularly in marriage ceremonies with extravagantly decorated pandals and catering services with exorbitant rates, wedding cakes, momos and non-veg items, on-site tea and hot snacks and lavish feasts during Mangani Chakkouba. So far, none of the cultural watchdogs or self-proclaimed reformers have issued limitations in the range of food items.
Well, wedding cakes and exchange of rings besides extravagant pandal decorations would have to go according to a diktat issued a few days back. With the entry of event managers or the modern day Arangphams, the expenses had gone through the roof. These events handle everything from erecting pandals and decorating them with extravagant paraphernalia, photography sessions and videography, organising wedding cake parties, catering services and what not. It was indeed lucky that they left the ritual part to the Arangphams.
Some of the diktats may sound reasonable or sensible in view of the extraneous expenses and celebration. However, it would have been much appreciated if these groups had resorted to reason and argument to convince the general public, instead of issuing diktats. They must try to understand that there is an inherent tendency among the public to resist any kind of diktat or restriction.
With ever-rising inflation, the rates of mandatory Potyeng-sel has increased to Rs 500 and 1000. Anything below is ridiculed. Again, it has become a ritual for everyone attending to celebrate the performers of Nat Sankritan with Rs 10 notes each. However, with the scarcity of Rs 10 notes in circulation, it has slowly been replaced with Rs 20 notes.
Nowadays, it has also become a practice to celebrate the elders seated in the front-row in the mandap with the same Rs 10 or 20 notes. Some groups have expressed reservations on the recent practice of ‘Bhabok Mamai Taaba’ or celebration of front row. But, one needs to understand how this practice came about. In the past, there were local elders who were willing to sit out from beginning to end of Sankritan. But with the passage of time, it had become difficult to find elders willing to sit out the entire session either busy out of personal business or attending other marriages held on the same day. On the other hand, a dedicated group of at least the front row Bhabok was needed for the Sankritan. So, it became a practice.
(The views expressed are personal)
